On a recent visit with a former work colleague, newly retired, the discussion turned to cleaning stuff out, or rather, downsizing. She pointed out after another recent move to her new retirement city that she was not really attached to stuff. After several moves for employment, she had consistently downsized with each move as it always cost money to move it. Military families I have met over the years have also shared this truth.
While there are always exceptions, it seems that the longer you live in your home, the more likely you have accumulated or saved more belongings. There are those, though, who make it part of their lives to clean out and pare down, even if it means renting a storage space. Those who invested in storage businesses a long time ago were visionary. This can be attested to by their growth. But there are other ways to pare down and ‘recycle’ still good items to someone else looking for just that item or treasure.
One friend with a big attic with easy access comes to mind. She boxes and bags no longer needed items and squirrels them away in the attic for the yearly neighborhood garage sale. She has been doing this for a number of years now and always makes enough for her efforts. I do not ask what she does with her money as it is not my business. But if I had to guess, it is for buying new stuff.
My personal approach is to try to find whatever it is a new home where it will be appreciated. It is also a form of living green. Something already made with human labor, resources, and paid for can be used by someone else. If all else fails, “free” has a magical sound. This worked great for a very old piano that still worked but needed to go to another home. The piano company that I had purchased my new one from wanted $75 to take it away to destroy it. They said no one wanted those anymore. But again, “free” solved my problem and made another family happy… besides saving me $75.
While I like to think of it as cleaning out; others call it downsizing, sharing the wealth, minimalizing, or some other term. Marie Kondo, a well-known professional organizing expert, calls it “tidying up.” She has many resources about how to go about this. But a few of my favorites that she shares is that it is not about getting rid of, but what you want to keep. She challenges you to think about its purpose in your life by asking yourself, “Does it spark joy” for you? If you decide to get rid of something, she suggests saying Thank you and Goodbye to it. While this may sound silly to some, including me at first, it has been helpful with some of the sentimental items that I should have let go a long time ago.
But since I have been working at this for a while, a little at a time, there are some things that I have learned. I had more stuff than realized. It was just hidden well in closets, cabinets, boxes, and wherever else I could stash it. You know… out of sight out of mind. Something else I have learned and this one is especially important: there are some treasures that you have kept for years that your kids just do not want. One of mine put it kindly, “No Mom. It doesn’t speak to me.”
The top things that I have found that they do not want are silver-plated items; collector plates, fine porcelain dinnerware; old photographs with very few exceptions; old vintage linens (except for quilts); old stamp collection from childhood, postcards, or other paper ephemera; books.
I recently found a list of the Top 10 Things Your Kids Do Not Want (Forbes) and yep… the above items were listed.
I am finally being able to see the progress in my efforts to eliminate by cleaning out and sharing. I am also very grateful for all the donors and bargain hunters who help support our community donation businesses in their search of good, reusable, or re-saleable items. I have also changed my approach with my children to tell me up front what they like if they do not want it to be donated. I have always thought my friends with attics, barns, and basements are so lucky as more space for storage. But then it depends on your perspective.
Teresa Holland is a writer, photographer, quilter, and advanced-practice registered nurse.
