HANCOCK COUNTY — The funeral industry is taking a fresh approach to the ways we lay our loved ones to rest.
The old standard of mourners dressed in black spending time by an open casket then saying a final farewell at a graveside service has gradually given way to a more celebratory approach.
“Twenty or 30 years ago, everybody had the same songs and the same readings and prayers, and nowadays you pick your music. Somber music is almost never the case anymore,” said B.J. Erlewein, who founded Erlewein Mortuary & Crematory in Greenfield with her husband, Dane, in 1995.
“Funerals are just transforming. Now they are really much more like a celebration,” she said.
Some families choose to forego a standard funeral altogether and instead host a celebration of life, where friends and family gather to share happy memories and celebrate with their loved one’s favorite food and music.
The way remains are handled has also been changing shape.
Cremation has steadily been on the rise for the past 20 years as families embrace the alternative to a standard burial.
Jeff Bell, who owns Bell Mortuary & Crematory in Fountaintown, said cremation has become much more mainstream in just the past five years.
When he and his wife Lynette founded the business in 1996, about 15% of families opted for cremation over standard burials. Now that number is around 60%.
“I’ve been in the business since 1983, and back then we typically did no more than three to four cremations a year,” he said.
The choice has also grown steadily at Erlewein Mortuary.
“When we started in 1996, we did zero cremations. The first year after that, we did about one a year,” said Erlewein, who said that now it’s a 50/50 split between the two.
Families can still opt to host an open-casket visitation before cremation if they choose.
Bell said that’s often the case at his funeral homes, but that visitations in general have become shorter over the years.
“Nowadays, everyone is doing a single day of visitation instead of a night of visitation and the funeral the next day, like they used to,” he said.
Mike Staton, who owns Seals Funeral Home & Cremation Services in Fortville, said the one-day trend emerged during the COVID pandemic.
“Whether that be a funeral service or just a simple cremation with a memorial service … the one-day service came about when gatherings were limited” and the trend stuck, said Seals, who has worked 30 years in the funeral industry.
Bells said an increasing number of families have been opting not to hold a traditional graveside service, which was the standard for generations.
Local funeral directors agree that the changing norms in the industry are simply a sign of the times.
Modern funerals, for example, have moved away from the unspoken requirement to dress in all black.
“Nowadays it seems like people just wear whatever they want,” said Bell.
Erlewein said some families encourage visitors to wear their late loved one’s favorite color. Some might even be encouraged to wear apparel celebrating the loved one’s favorite sports team.
In the end, it’s all about honoring and celebrating the person who has passed away, Erlewein said.
“Now instead of walking into a funeral home and hearing the traditional organ music and hymns, you might hear AC/DC or Kenny Chesney,” she said. “The sky’s the limit as far as what a family chooses and how they decide to celebrate that life.”
Another fairly new trend within the funeral industry is the option of green funerals, which are touted as environmentally friendly options.
According to the Green Burial Council at greenburialcouncil.org, a green burial is a way of caring for the deceased with minimal environmental impact, using nontoxic and biodegradable materials including caskets, shrouds and urns. The website states the option conserves natural resources, reduces carbon emissions and restores or preserves natural habitat.
While the Erlewein and Bell mortuaries can offer green burial services, Erlewein said such burials are currently only available at four cemeteries throughout the state, including Washington Park Cemetery in Indianapolis.
Another fairly new alternative is water cremation, otherwise known as alkaline hydrolysis.
While cremated remains can be interred in a cemetery, the family also has the option of keeping the cremains in an urn at home, or keeping a small amount in a locket or other specially designed keepsake.
Some families opt to sprinkle the ashes in a place that was meaningful to the deceased.
The environmental effect of both types of cremation continues to be studied by environmental experts, as some cemeteries — including Park Cemetery in Greenfield — are expanding onto adjacent land to offer additional burial plots.
No matter how a body is laid to rest, those in the funeral industry encourage families to celebrate what made their loved one unique.
Bell has had families request that a person’s favorite drink like a can of Coke or Pepsi be placed within a casket.
Others might consider adding a special family heirloom, like a lace handkerchief, or something to reflect a person’s cherished pastimes, like a golf club or deck of cards. Some families add letters to their loved ones, while a few have requested that the crematory urn of a beloved spouse be included in a casket when the remaining spouse passes away.
“It’s really up to the wishes of the family and the individual,” said Erlewein.
