Tucker Carlson says the coronavirus vaccine is getting too much promotion.
"It’s arriving in small bottles, but with a glitzy entrance," he recently told his audience. "The coronavirus vaccine has been accompanied by the kind of corporate image campaign you typically associate with higher-end consumer products."
COVID-19 is killing Americans at the rate of one every 30 seconds or so, and the numbers are likely to get worse.
Still, Carlson would scale back the news coverage.
"Suddenly the COVID vaccine is on the morning shows," he said. "It’s being touted on celebrity Twitter accounts, and the news about it is uniformly glowing. This stuff is just great. A lot of famous people say so."
He mentioned the actor Ian McKellan. Well, not by name actually. He referred to McKellan as the guy who played Gandalf in the "Lord of the Rings" series, and he read McKellan’s comment on the day he got the vaccine.
"It’s a very special day," McKellan said. "I feel euphoric. I would have no hesitation in recommending it to anyone. I feel very lucky to have had the vaccination."
Carlson went on to tell the story of a health care worker in Juneau, Alaska.
"She got the vaccine two days ago," he said, "Woman had no history of allergies, but within minutes, she developed a severe anaphylactic reaction to it, and then had trouble breathing. She wound up in the emergency room overnight. It was all a fantastic experience, according to the doctor who treated her."
Carlson’s sarcasm was impossible to miss. "What a cheerful patient she must be," he said. "We’ve got to assume she is, in any case, because we can’t really know. The authorities didn’t release her name. All we know is she’s a highly satisfied customer. Yet another. Have a vaccine and a smile. Just do it." Even if you support the idea of vaccines, Carlson said, this whole marketing campaign is just too slick.
"The Gandalf guy was euphoric because he got a shot?" Carlson asked. "It wasn’t heroin, it was the corona vaccine. The lady who couldn’t breathe is enthusiastic as she is rushed to the emergency room? Come on."
Stop being patronizing, he said. Get rid of the slogans.
"Better to treat Americans like adults," he said. "Explain the benefits, be honest about the risks, and let the rest of us decide."
At this point, you could almost sense the audience rising up.
"In this country, we control our own bodies," Carlson said. "They’re always telling us that. But no. Suddenly, the rules have changed. On the question of the corona vaccine, our leaders are definitely not pro-choice. Their view is do what you’re told, and don’t complain, and no uncomfortable questions." And then, almost out of nowhere, he took off on those evil social media giants in Silicon Valley.
"Twitter announced a new policy to censor any unauthorized inquiry about the vaccine," he said. "Or, as the company put it, false or misleading narratives about COVID-19 vaccinations."
The company, he said, plans to censor any claim that this vaccine might be used to "control populations."
"So, whatever you do, don’t say this is social control, because if you do, the richest and most powerful people in the world will act in perfect coordination to shut you down immediately."
Do me a favor. Ignore Tucker Carlson.
Wear a mask. Wash your hands. Avoid large crowds. Stay 6 feet apart.
And when you get a chance to get the vaccine, get it.
We’re in line for a rough winter, hoping for a brighter spring and summer. Listening to guys like Tucker Carlson will only make things worse.
Kelly Hawes is a columnist for CNHI newspapers in Indiana.
