David Lee Ward stands by a memorial outside Fort Knox military base in Kentucky in 2016. Ward, who lived in Mohawk after serving in the Vietnam War, died from Agent Orange complications in 2017. He’ll be inducted into the In Memory Honor Roll in Washington, D.C. on June 18.
MOHAWK — Nikki Ward knew not to touch her husband when he was sleeping.
The Vietnam War veteran could react violently if startled, having suffered from post traumatic stress disorder after serving two years with the U.S. Army in Vietnam.
He warned his future wife of such before the two got married in 1973, three years after he returned from combat.
“I was grabbed by the throat several times (in his sleep), but he never meant it. Loud noises would scare him, and he had tinnitus in his ears,” said Ward, who lives in Mohawk.
She never let all that deter her from falling in love. “I was just thrilled that I had met him, and that he had come home” from war, she said.
The two enjoyed 44 happy years together before he died in 2017 from complications stemming from exposure to Agent Orange, a chemical that was used widely in combat but has since proven to cause severe health problems and sometimes death, years and decades after exposure.
On June 18, the combat vet will be among 513 veterans honored in Washington, D.C. through In Memory, a memorial dedicated to families of Vietnam Veterans lost to Agent Orange complications and Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome resulting in suicide.
Ward is among only four Hoosiers to be added to the In Memory Honor Roll this year.
Nikki Ward will travel there to honor the memory of the man she loved, as well as all Vietnam veterans who lost their lives due to complications from the war.
“Two members from your family can go up to the front and read your person’s name to honor them,” said Ward, who will be accompanied on the trip by her daughter, nephew and sister.
The day after the ceremony, the family will place roses by the Vietnam Veterans Memorial wall and the In Memory plaque.
Ward is moved to tears thinking of her husband being honored in the nation’s capital after the lifelong struggles he endured as a result of serving his country at war.
“I’m just so proud,” she said of her husband, who earned the Vietnam Service Medal and the Vietnam Cross.
She went through a lengthy application process to submit her late husband’s name to be chosen among those to be honored through In Memory this year. The application required proof of service and a certificate proving the veteran’s death stemmed from effects of the war.
In Memory was created in 1993 by Friends of the Vietnam Veterans Memorial, which has hosted the annual induction ceremony since 1999.
More than 5,000 veterans have been added to the In Memory Honor Roll, their names listed on a plaque on the grounds of the Vietnam Veterans Memorial site in Washington, D.C.
“Vietnam Veterans are dying by the thousands,” said Ward, whose late husband was drafted at the height of the war in 1969.
“Agent Orange has since caused all different kinds of cancers. They had no idea what it was doing to our service men, and post traumatic stress has unfortunately led so many to commit suicide,” Ward said this week.
While the effects of Agent Orange often take years to surface, Ward’s late husband was up front about his Post Traumatic Stress Disorder from the start of their relationship.
The Indianapolis native was married to someone else when he was drafted into service and received a “Dear John” letter from her while he was away at war.
When he returned home in 1970, a mutual friend told Nikki Ward about the jilted soldier who was too gun-shy to start dating again. Nikki, who was dating someone else at the time, convinced a friend to go on a blind date with Ward, but the friend had a change of heart and never showed up at the softball game he was umpiring in Greenfield.
Feeling bad about it, Nikki grabbed another friend and headed out to introduce her to the former soldier, but it was Ward who ended up falling in love with him.
“He and I talked for hours that night,” Ward recalled. “That was in May 1973, and we got married that November.”
Beyond warning he couldn’t be touched when he’s asleep, Ward said her husband didn’t talk much about his experiences in Vietnam until 2013, after he connected with a group of fellow 19th Combat Engineers through an annual reunion at Fort Leonard Wood in Missouri.
The Wards attended the reunion every September until he died in 2017.
“He talked more about the war in those four years because those guys were there (in Vietnam) with him, so they knew what he’d been through, and it was good for him,” said Nikki Ward, who still goes each year to connect with fellow members of the Seahorse Sweeties, a group for the spouses of former combat engineers.
Ward plans to connect with fellow war widows at a welcome dinner in Washington, D.C. the night before the upcoming In Memory induction ceremony.
“I belong to a group on Facebook that are widows and widowers from Agent Orange, and I’ve already put out there that anybody who wants to meet up should look me up. It’s nice to be there for each other to talk and commiserate,” she said.
